Authors, Accept the Challenge of Changing Things: Responsibility
3 of 28 big ideas from the world of coaching to grow your author business
The third in a 28-part series on 28 big ideas from coaching for authors to coach themselves, adapatd from my book, The Coach Within.
“Freedom is choosing responsibility. It’s not having no responsibilities; it’s choosing the ones you want.”
— Toni Morrison
“There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them.”
— Denis Waitley
Another crucial concept for coaching oneself, close on the heels of creativity, is responsibility. And in this regard, coaching yourself is not all that different from having a coach. Because one thing a coach is not is responsible for your success. A coach doesn’t do your work, determine your path, or do half of the heavy lifting. It’s all you.
What!? That’s right. A coach’s commitment to you is their whole attention, presence, interest, curiosity, and support. They validate, challenge, and — maybe the best one — believe in you. A coach believes in your creativity and capabilities, your goals and larger vision, and your being bigger than your current circumstances, and reflects that to you even when you’re not so sure of it yourself. That makes them a powerful ally in accomplishing your agenda. But not responsible for it.
That is all you.
No one is coming. You may have heard that one before. No rescuer, no savior, no one else with the answers, fixes, secret playbook. It’s up to you to succeed as you define it. To chart the course of your author journey, live it fully, reap its rewards, correct course when needed, even perhaps find peace and happiness in the process…
You may resist it initially, or frequently, or from time to time, but when you shift into acknowledgment of the the importance of responsibility, and then acceptance of it, and then commitment to the idea that so much is in your hands, things change and your life starts becoming more and more your own.
There is so much upside to this realization. Really. Empowerment. Satisfaction. Freedom. The intangibles of a good life, a life well lived. Dreams coming true.
If there were a secret playbook for responsibility, it might contain this:
Author, make things happen for yourself. The opportunities will arise in every corner for you to own your choices and take actions for which you are accountable. And you will be glad and grateful for what ensues.
Note: If you want to heighten your own adventures in responsibility, there is no better book than this one by psychologist Nathaniel Branden: Taking Responsibility: Self-Reliance and the Accountable Life.
If you’re not sure why you’re unable to make the change you desire for your author business, is it possible you don’t know what you don’t know?
Coaching Yourself in Action
⎕ Spend meditation or walking time today assessing the degree of responsibility you take for your desired author outcomes — in general and in particular aspects of it. Notice where you tend to blame people or circumstances, what makes you feel victimized. How can you shift to an attitude of inspired responsibility for those things you can change?
⎕ In your journal, make a note of some places in your author life where you have been avoiding taking responsibility, along with some possible steps you can take in each area that could start turning that around. Where will you start? Can you pledge some sweat equity to the concept? How big are you thinking? How responsible can you be?
⎕ Practice: You can’t change everything and you can’t change things all at once, but you can do something today. Choose any author or book marketing or bookselling situation to demonstrate your new habit of responsibility and observe yourself doing so. Why not start with the one you turn away from most (where’s the shudder, the embarrassment, the cringe?). Take a baby step if that’s the most you can muster…or is it? What did you notice that can keep you on the path to reaping the cumulative rewards of taking responsibility?
Plan Ahead for 2025
All my coaching pacakges for authors will be 10% off through 11/30/2024 in anticipation of price increases in January. (Sessions can be used in 2024 and 2025.) Learn more.
In January, my new Substack Profitable Author Life subscription and community will begin for those who are committed to building an income-generating sustainable author business they love of any size. And I hope you'll strongly consider joining us.
The subscription will actively address 6 of the 7 steps of my Profitable Author framework. (Step #4, The doing of 5 things a day every day to promote your books and author business is up to you.)
It will come with a guarantee that if after two months you haven't made back the cost of the subscription that you can request a free 30-minute phone call with me to get you on track.
It will come with an additional guarantee that if you engage with the material, participate in the group, and do the basic work on behalf of your books and author business and don't at least 10x back the cost of your subscription in a year's time, you can request a full refund of the subscription cost. (I happen to think it wouldn't take much for the industrious to 100x or 500x your investment.)
It will be a group for those who:
are committed to making a profit on their author activities;
know it is possible to have the author life they desire but may not be sure how;
will actively participate, learn, and test new ideas;
want the group coaching, business education, mindset support, and networking that this vibrant group will offer; and
are ready to dive in.
Finally, among other things, it will feature a new weekly roundup, for subscribers only, of new things on my publishing and book marketing radar. That is, when I learn something new or see something new out in the book world, I will pass it on to you so you can benefit from it also.